Yes, I tested early. I have had some crazy sore bbs the past couple days and yesterday evening was the worst. Even going to bed, it was uncomfortable to lay on them. I never get this sore of bbs in the 2WW, so I caved. I have no idea why my bbs are so sore, but it obviously is not because I am pg. Well, crap.
I had a bad night on Thursday. Because I knew I wasn't pg this month. As you all know, I am psycho about checking CM and CP, well, my CM started drying up just as it always does before AF. I got in a bad mood and told Jared that I just want to give up. I am so sick of infertility and I feel like the fertility meds are not going to help us. We talked and Jared put my head back on straight and told me that we are not giving up, that we are just at the beginning of the fertility treatments, there are so many more things that we can try. I know he was right, but there is just this fear that we will try all of these treatments and none of them will work.
I can't really describe it, but it is one of the most stressful, depressing things that I have ever gone through. Then I get these sore bbs and think I still may have a chance. uggh.
Well, I don't really know what our next step will be. I do know that whatever meds they put me on, I will be asking to start the IUI's on this next cycle. They may keep me on Clomid or they may try something else that will not thin my lining. I will call my Dr, once AF is here and discuss it at that time.
Sorry for my venting this morning. I hope all of you Mom's have a wonderful day!! We are having family over to our place for a BBQ, so I will be sure and take lots of pics and post some here.
6 comments:
Oh Amy, I am so sorry...I know I can't say anything to make you feel better...know we are praying for you and looking forward to celebrating with you when you are blessed with another child...We love you
Amy - I'm so sorry you didn't get better news today. I know it has to hurt you and I have no idea what you are going through. Please don't lose faith. We are all here if you need us!
Ugh! My heart stopped when I saw the HPT...but then I read the window :( UGH!!!!!!! I'm so sorry! Don't give up! I'm glad you have Jared to keep you sane! *hugs* I'm still prayin' for you! I love you!
Amy, God loves you. He knows how you feel and what you think everyday. Everything is done in His time. Please have faith in him. I am praying for you.
Amy, I am so sorry to see this ugly test!! Please dont give up, you are going to be such a wonderful mother again someday soon. Hang in there and always know you can lean on any of us. I am praying for you always!
Amy - I don't know what I can say to make things better for you. Don't give up because I think it will happen when you least expect it! I am praying for you and Jared and am here for you if you need me.
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